Notes to Myself - By Hugh Prather

I have had this book with me for years, and i never found the time or inclination to pick it up and read it (though i have been voraciously reading mindless novels).

And now that I have started reading it, this book has made me ask a 1000 questions to myself. The name of the book might sound cliched, but the book isn't. If anything, its lucid, profound and sincere. And it makes you wonder. It makes you feel like looking at a new star in the sky, or maybe looking at an old one with new perception. Any one line from this book could make you realize some aspect of your own behavior, that might have gone undetected, even by you for all your life. Go read it...and then read it!

Some of the gems from this treasure trove...

1. Today, I don’t want to live for. I want to live
2. Whenever I find myself arguing for something with great passion, I can be certain I’m not convinced.
3. When someone disagrees with me, I do not have to immediately start revising what I just said.
4. If you tell me the way you see it rather than the way it is, then this helps me to more fully discover the way I see it.
5. What did I do to deserve birth? It was gift.
6. The most realistic attitude for me to have toward future consequences is ‘it will be interesting to see what happens’. Excitement, dejection and boredom assume a knowledge of results that I cannot have.
7. My trouble is, I analyze life instead of live it.
8. The bully in me always bullies in the name of principle or in the name of rules. The bully in me always has a reason for its actions and that reason is always idealistic. This part of me is a sissy-it hides behind ‘what is right’, so I won’t have to admit my desire to hurt.
9. Happiness is a present attitude and not a future condition.
10. My feelings do change and that I can have a hand in changing them. They change simply by my becoming aware of them. When I acknowledge my feelings, they become more positive. And they change when I express them. For example, if I tell a man I don’t like him, I usually like him better.
11. I choose to use my own mind. I do not need your mind. I want to experience you, listen to you - not to myself. I have already heard everything I have to say. You are what is novel about this conversation.
12. The configuration of most situations implies through tradition, a corresponding emotion. E.g., your wife goes out on you therefore you are enraged (when actually you might be aroused). I often respond the way I should feel rather than the way I do feel. Confusion or indecision is a good thing this is happening.
13. The most realistic attitude for me to have toward future consequences is ‘it will be interesting to see what happens’. Excitement, dejection and boredom assume a knowledge of results that I cannot have.
14. The comment ‘you’re lucky; it could have been worse’, is the kind of helpfulness I can do without. It also could have been better, or actually, it couldn’t have been any other way than the way it was.
15. Most decisions, possibly all, have already been made on some deeper level and my going through a reasoning process to arrive at them seems at least redundant.'

And the 2 most brilliant ones...

• If a man takes off his sunglasses I can hear him better
• I have already heard everything I have to say